I’ve spoken about this event to a few, but always with hesitation because I want so desperately for people not to make a big deal of me.
But I realized that in trying to remain behind the curtain, I have unintentionally missed out on an opportunity to make a big deal out of God.
So here it is, in plain words.
On March 21, 2018, I went to the hospital, where a surgeon cut out my left kidney and gave it to a complete stranger. Why? Because I believe God wanted me to.
That sounds crazy, I know. Maybe I am crazy after all. But let me explain.
(Watch the video here, or read the full transcript below.)
God created this insanely gorgeous and intricate world. Part of that world is us, the humans. I often marvel at how many things could go wrong in our bodies, but don’t. And yet, sometimes things do go wrong, because the world God created got broken. It has been broken by evil, by sadness and illness, by apathy and many other hurts.
God didn’t make it that way and the ultimate plan is to un-break it for eternity, but He allows it to be that way for this brief glimpse of eternity because it gives us an opportunity to show His love to each other.
He loved us to the point of death, and I believe that He calls us, as Christians, to follow Him every day, to be like Him in giving up our lives in big and small ways as a demonstration of His great love.
My hope is that in giving of this kidney, others will know of His love.
Let me be clear: I would not be doing this if it wasn’t for God. My heart just isn’t that kind, generous, and altruistic. I hate needles, IVs and sedation. My heart wants to cling to my health, my wholeness, and my pain-free existence.
But Jesus chose to let go of his health, his wholeness, his pain-free existence out of His great love for me, so I will choose to follow Him in this small act.
I stand in front of you today, living proof that GOD IS LOVE.
I have no idea who my kidney is going to save. It could be a child whose parents have begged God for an answer. It could be an elderly person who has lost hope. It could be an atheist who doesn’t believe in God at all.
It doesn’t matter. And this is grace. A free gift with no strings attached. God is grace, and He gives a gift with no strings attached.
GOD IS LOVE and because He has shown His great love to me, my life utterly overflows with His love. That overflow has to go somewhere, and this is where it goes. Out. To the world. To the person who inherits my kidney, to the family who loves them, to you who hear these words, and ultimately, back to my Creator.
I choose to love the Lord my God with all my heart, my soul, my mind, and my body. Let me be honest: it’s hard to love with everything you’ve got. There’s fear, there’s uncertainty, and there’s doubt on my part. But – it’s NOT ABOUT ME. It’s about the infinite outpouring of love that overwhelms me. There’s nothing I need to do to prove to God that I love Him. But there is something I can do to show the world how much YOU are loved.
I love you, because God loves me.
GOD IS LOVE.
And in the end, if all I am is crazy, someone out there will still have known sacrificial love. They’ll know it because my kidney filters their blood while they play, eat, and sleep.
But I am confident that I am not crazy. And I am confident that GOD IS LOVE.
And that is why I am doing this. I’m going to lay down on that operating table, not because I’m a great human being. I’m not. I will do it because GOD IS LOVE and He has given me so much love that I can’t help but love radically.
GOD IS LOVE.
One of the reasons I did this is that I want to be an example to my kids.
I want them to see that following God can truly change lives, both on earth and for eternity.
I want them to see that my faith affects my life choices. I don’t want faith to be theoretical to them, but for God to be an active participant in their lives. If I can liken my life to driving a car, I want them to see a life that has handed God the wheel.
I want them to see me actively participating in God’s plans here on earth, not simply focusing on going to heaven when I die.
This has probably been the hardest part of faith formation for me. By nature I am an introvert, and like to keep my faith fairly private. So bringing my faith out into the open both online and in my family has been a great challenge, but has brought many sweet moments with my children.
My biggest struggle with regard to faith formation has been living my faith in front of them, rather than keeping it private. I find it easy to teach, less easy to model. But I’m growing!
If you’d like to know how I got to this point, read this post from the beginning of my donor journey!